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Monday, June 25, 2012

can you help?

I honestly have no idea how many, if any, two-mom or two-dad families read this blog.  But if there are any of you out there, or any couples for that matter, can you lend a hand?

In November the state of Maine will once again have the chance to do the right thing and make marriage equality a reality.  Three years ago our governor had written this civil right into law and in November 2009 a people's veto voted it out .  To say it was heartbreaking would be a gross understatement.  Sandi wrote this piece about the emotional fallout of losing that vote.

To have this issue voted on again a mere three years later feels akin to walking into a butcher shop and offer yourself up for the carving.  I've mostly felt vulnerable and raw about it, unprepared for the attention and criticism directed at couples and families like ours. We are peace loving, vegetarian, lesbians who recycle and don't believe in war so this isn't our most comfortable hour.  And I don't even read the newspaper or watch the news to hear the hate.  I can feel it.  I'm not quite ready to feel it again and have people talking in strong, opinionated tones about my life and my love.

Yet, I'm a fighter and I won't take this vote lying down.  I have to say I am carefully guarding my heart this time, but we have found some ways to add to the cause.  Sandi's amazing aunt, the original Suzanne Carver, is leading a nearly one-woman show in rural, downeast Maine to garnish the vote of some of the more conservative Mainers.  This is a region that was non convinced last time around three years ago. 

Aunt Suzie and we know her is a fiery, determined, imaginative, motivated woman who simply can't stand still in the face of injustice.  She is the kind of woman you would be blessed to have working with you and fearful to have working against you. She, and her husband and their amazing eight-year-old son Noah, have taken on this cause and are bringing the heat.  They have spent countless hours and their own money to create some visibility and awareness at the upcoming Fourth of July celebration in Jonesport/Beals (where Sandi is from), a great platform since everyone in the two towns and many of the surrounding ones, flock to the festivities.

Aunt Suzie has banners, mini rainbow flags, Hershey kisses and lollipops with marriage stickers on them.  They have constructed a float for the grand parade called, "Liberty and Justice for all" and have laminated a picture of our family to put on the back window of their truck and have asked us and any other gay couples or families to walk alongside.  (Want to?)  They are going to pull a flatbed with giant TVs and speakers to broadcast the uplifting, pro-marriage video Sandi and I are making. 

(Can we pause for a moment to fully appreciate the amount of family support we have?  I mean, a hug and a "I love you even if you're gay" would be nice, but banners and candy?  WOW.)

That is where you might come in.  Sandi's vision for the video is to have images of all sorts of different couples, faces that will make the issue more personal to those watching the parade.  Have you ever heard the expression it's easier to hate a group than to hate a person?  There are so many people whose opinion regarding gay marriage is swayed by personal stories. I just had this experience last week with my neighbor.  When he saw the pain this issue caused me and heard me talk about how it will effect our girls, he came back to say that he had changed his mind and would vote for equality in November.

There are so many people in this position. Once they see and hear the individuals that are effected, their hearts and minds open.  The video is set to One Republic's "Marching On" and it is coming along nicely.  The problem is we still need more pictures!!  We've only had about 10 couples/families respond.  Would you be willing to help? We want people from all over, not just Maine.  And if you are not gay (I won't hold it against you) do you have any friends that are?  (I know some of your BEST friends are gay....)  Pics can be emailed to Sandi at  THANK YOU!!!

The video needs to be done by tomorrow so we can overnight ship it to Aunt Suzie.  So if you can help please help now!!  And if you want to march we would LOVE to have you. Downeast coastal Maine is beautiful this time of year. The parade is Saturday June 30th at 6 PM.

As a side note:  since watching the Fourth of July parade last year, Ella has been asking to be in a parade.  I can only guess she gets this from me.  Since we aren't the beauty pageant type and most of the young girls are in the parade for winning a pageant title, we weren't really sure how to make this dream a reality.  But here we are, ready to march as a family.  The two mom thing just keeps on working of us.


Jenn said...

Would you mind if I shared this post on facebook?
Have you considered posting your request on either the EqualityMaine ( or Mainers United for Marriage ( facebook pages? You might get a bigger response on sites like those.

I've got my fingers crossed that the vote will go in the right (well, correct) direction this time. I have faith that a lot of the new, young voters are more open-minded and accepting than their elderly counterparts.

P.S. Thank you for the info on the aquarium a couple of weeks ago.

love is written here said...

Jenn, please do! It's been all over and the deadline is very soon. Thanks for the ideas though!

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