caught off guard

The other day I was catching up with a mom I've known peripherally over the years while we sat and watched our kids' swimming lessons.  Maya was sitting next to me on the bench.  The woman looked over at her and said, "She is so cute.  She looks just like your wife."

I swear I almost said "Who?"

I have never had anyone call Sandi that before.

Recently I have had people look at Maya and tell me, "She is so cute.  She looks just like you. You must be so proud."  As though I can take a single bit of credit for her adorableness.  It is the strangest feeling and I never know what to say (shock of all shocks) and so I usually just let "thank you" suffice.  I mean Maya is cute even if I had nothing to do with it.

And regarding being speechless, I had no idea how to respond when Maya said this to me this morning: "I want Mommy to be home. If Mommy is at home I can love you.  But I just cannot love you if she isn't.  I won't do it. I won't love you without Mommy."

I did the only thing I could do.  I called Sandi and tattled on her.

I'm pretty sure that Maya is just making me her punching bag for all of her frustrations regarding Sandi's absences, but I can tell you it is getting old.  Every limit I set, every thing I ask of her (teeth brushing, hair brushing, getting dressed, getting in the car-you know, all the unreasonable things parents ask of their children) she howls that she wants Sandi and fights me every step.  So yes, I tattle on her sometimes just so she can hear Sandi provide the united front. 

Translation:  it isn't Momma's fault that Mommy is gone.

I think I need a t-shirt that says that.