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Sunday, November 11, 2007

Nobody Told Me...

Tia, Ella & Maya

Momma & Ella Romping on the Couch

An Evening of Lounging

Big Smiles

Gramma & Maya

Hanging out with Mommy

Nobody told me just how much fun we'd be having when we came home from the hospital. Let's see.... a very rambunctious 3 year old who appears to be jealous of the shared attention and testing every limit out there (even the ones we've yet to set).... night time gas attacks that keep Maya uncomfortable and the rest of us awake walking the floors trying not to fall asleep (I remember this with Ella, but for some reason, it was easier then - at least that's how I remember it).... incessantly sore and voluptuous boobs (that part's not so bad for the short term).... a nipple that she is banned from until it heals (I won't go into details).... a perineum that is getting better but still makes me nervous on trips to the bathroom (again, will omit the details).... a house that needs constant picking up after the hurricane that is Ella runs through.... and now to add to the list, mastitis. Oh yes, two days of fever, aches, chills, sleeping, hot packs and pumping to get rid of the infection. Boy! Am I ever having fun. Eating is a part time job. A few nights ago, I went to bed as most people do when it gets dark. I eat after Maya feeds so that I'll make more milk (like most nursing moms do). Before I got up for the next day, I had consumed a large slice of turkey pot pie, a Bagel Central bagel loaded with cream cheese, a banana, a large glass of soy milk, a glass of orange juice, two waffles doused in syrup, several strawberries and 3 1/2 liters of water. Who knew we were feeding a bear??

Oh, and the roller coaster ride of hormonal shifts that produce the daily sobbing session... definitely one of the most fun parts of the postpartum period. I seem to be coming out of that as the mastitis is subsiding. All in all, I'm dealing with each minute as it comes. Honestly, I have to say that despite it all (and even though I'm still in the middle of it), I would never trade this experience. It is rich and abundant. It touches just about every emotion in each day. I feel very much alive even in the moments where all I want is to lay my head on a pillow. It's exhausting and exhilarating. It saps me and then fills me back up.

I am blessed by the joy of being a parent. I am humbled at the feet of these beings that chose to be part of our lives. I would not trade a second. And now my eyes are filled again....


Meredith said...

Sandi, I love this piece for how it gets to the reality of what is involved in this giving of life. The gift part is literal; we muster up parts of ourselves that we may have never needed or known in order to sacrifice them for this new magic... and you're right. If it weren't for the pain then we wouldn't know the joy. Thank you for this candid portrait. If there's one word that DOESN'T apply to motherhood, it's "easy".

Emilie said...

I am tempted to wake up my kids and head over with another bag of food (should I worry about your food budget!!?) immediatlely. I want to come clean your house for you. I just remember all of this so damn clearly. You capture the roller coaster perfectly and honestly. Hang in there. Life will look hugely different in a week.

Jeannine said...

Drink up this wonderful chaos that now seems like it will be embedded in your memories forever... Time slips away so quickly as I'm sure you're already realizing. Today you're changing diapers and potty training and tomorrow you'll be doing drivers ed and taking the girls off to college! At the mere age of 44, I already have absences in my memory and sometimes feel so lost when one of my kids will say "Remember that time we...?" etc. I was so sure that I'd always remember everything but time has a way thinning things out-so to speak. It is so heart warming to read about the passion with which you both embrace these wonderful gifts you've been given. Your comments refresh my memories a little and bring a warm happy feeling to my heart...
Love, Jeannine

Jeannine said... this is my third attempt to comment on this blog as I seem to get continually interrupted or have managed to loose my comments in process! Third times a charm, right??!!
I want to say that I feel so priveleged to be able to share in this experience with you - via this blog. You have stirred such sweet memories in my heart! You feel like you'll always remember all of this as everything is so vivid now but time will wash some of it away as I now begin to realize when one of my "babies" will come to me and say "Mom, remember when we...?" and I have to painfully admit that I don't always "remember when". Work hard to ingrain these days - the easy & not so easy - in your minds as they are so precious. Before you know it you'll be taking the girls for driver ed and next off to college!!
Love, J

Killian said...

I don't even remember what you ate because you ate so much!!!!


wendyer said...

This writing brings back a lot of memories of when we had three boys in four and a half years. Bill was working 55+ hours a week then for Coca-Cola and I had no family nearby. I don't know how I ever took care of them alone for so many hours it day but I managed somehow. Looking back I wouldn't have traded a minute of it--but I am soooo glad to be on this end of it.

I have been off my feet for two weeks with an ankle condition that hasn't improved since early July. I have some nice new shiny crutches. I am not supposed to walk on my foot until I see an orthopedic foot/ankle surgeon on November 27th in Portland. Then I'll find out if I have to have surgery or if I can just have it casted for a couple of months.

I've been at home alone mostly for the last two weeks as getting out too often on crutches is a drag. I really miss being on two feet. When you come to town please call so I can come see you guys and the baby. I miss you all very much. Having this injury makes missing Bill even stronger. I need the love and laughter of friends to lift my spirits.

Lovely photos,

The Thai Family said...

Hey guys. We got your message a few weeks ago but with two kids we too are crazy busy all the time. We should try to get together and compare horror stories! =) We miss being your neighbors!

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