Seriously?

Ella has been saying the most INCREDIBLE things to me.



Yesterday, at breakfast she said, "Is my spirit still here?" Then she lifted up her dress, checked her tummy and said, "Yup."



I was commenting on how I love when the city paints the lines back on the road so we can see where to go. She asked why and I explained that in the winter they get worn off and then they paint them back on. As if fully grasping now the constant evolution of seasons she said, "And then they will wear off again in the winter and they will paint them back on again." To everything, turn, turn, turn.



We pulled into a shopping center and there was a woman walking into the pharmacy. She was wearing a slightly inappropriate top, like a halter top that forgot to cover her belly, with a long flowing skirt. Ella had been remarking on loving summer because of short sleeves, skirts and dresses. "Like her skirt, Momma," she said. "Except, what is her shirt?" I told her it was like a small t-shirt.



Ella very confidently and without the slightest bit of scorn, says, "No. That's more like a bra."



When we went to Storyland, Sandi took her into a shop to get some things (read: junk) and told her that she could pick out the much requested t-shirt in addition to the jewlery she had already chosen. Ella told her that she wanted to get two matching stuffed animals, one for her and one for Brevie. And that is just what she did. The look of pure joy on her face when she gave it to him should be bottled and sold for good money.

We got a new Jewel CD (my favorite female singer and a long anticipated purchase for me.) Ella has taken a shine to Jewel, my heart beat proud. However, if anyone remembers last summer's loop play of the Beach Boys "Barbara Ann" (we listened to it on repeat the entire 2 hour trip to Beals last summer) then you know Ella can ruin a song for an adult better than anyone I know. Sandi would say, "Well, I used to like Barbara Ann...." Well, Ella is slightly obsessed with the first track of the Jewel CD. And, she's a girl after my own heart, singing along with the chorus: "I'm gonna love myself more than anyone else- believe in me even if no one can see the stronger woman in me. Gonna be my own best friend, stick with me 'till the end. Gonna lose myself again? No. No. Cause there's a stronger woman, stronger woman in me." I tell you, Raffi can't beat Jewel with a stick.

The other night she slept with us while I was racked with a bout of the stomach flu (long story as to why she was in the bed next to the germs.) When she woke up in the morning, instead of asking me to rub her arm like she ALWAYS does whenever anyone snuggles with her, I woke out of a deep, sick sleep to find her rubbing my arm just as gently and with just as much love as I rub hers.

This morning she got up at 5:15, ostensibly to "spend time with my family." I think she was hungry and the light was bright around her window shades.

We've had some TOUGH emotional dramas with Ella in the past month or so but they finally seem to ebbing. What is left is a smooth stone, like a piece of sea glass whose edges have been buffed by the surf, one you want to rub with your thumb as it sits nestled in your pocket. I want to hold her at arm's length and see if I still see it or if my vision is clouded from being so close. And when I do, when I step back, I see that she is truly becoming the little person she came here to be- the determined, magical, gifted, free-spirited and vibrant being she came to be. When I look at the rest of the pictures Amanda took of the girls (which we'll post soon) I know that she sees it too and got it on film.





I said to Ella as we sat snuggling today, "You are such a special little girl." She replied, "Thank you, Momma." Thank you Ella. Thank you for picking us.