Some things I've learned since becoming a parent

1. Sometimes a good night sleep on the end of several sleepless nights makes one even more tired.

2. Few things smell better than Johnson’s Baby Shampoo on the head of a sleeping child.

3. Your children don’t usually have malicious intent when they ask you “but when are we leaving?” for the 100th time or “yes/no/yes/no” in response to an easy question, they are simply trying words and interactions out for the pure fun of it.

4. I would rather spend my tax return on a new swing set than a trip away.

5. While I may not have grown the extra hands I pray for at night, I have learned to better utilize the two I have.

6. That the best part of a jam packed holiday weekend can be the time where everyone gets out of the car in an empty parking lot and you chase your three-year-old around.

7. I’ve begun to understand the notion of a family unit- wherein I do things sometimes for the harmony of the circle of us, rather than fulfilling my own intentions.

8. I know that the sweet smell of a baby’s breath cannot be overshadowed even by the freshest lilac blossom.

9. I understand why experienced moms have messy houses.

10. Few things feel as good in your hand and the soft, fleshy, smallness of your child’s hand.

11. A dog can be a general hassle when you have children, but it makes the best cleaner-upper of all food flung by said children.

12. That being sick and having children to take care of (especially sick ones) is pretty much the worst feeling in the world.

13. I’ve learned it’s worth getting excited about the tinkle of the ice cream truck, catching sight of the first spring butterfly, REALLY good macaroni and cheese, licking the cake batter beaters, finding a new playground and sleeping all together in one big bed.

14. Going to work is “time off.”

15. And that coming home, hearing the unrestrained peels of laughter and excitement at my arrival would warm me through and through like a 1,000 cups of cocoa.

16. It is best to travel with too many wipes than too few.

17. Even though it’s heavy, bring all the clothes for all possible weather patterns.

18. If a dishwasher your kitchen is without, pillage, debt or beg until you get one.

19. That babies give you such huge, gummy grins when they wake at 4:30 a.m. that it is impossible to be angry with them.

20. A colossal, blow-up Elmo and Frosty the Snowman are not the worst things that can happen to your lawn.

21. The start of Sesame Street Live can actually make you cry when you see your child’s face aglow and full of awe when Big Bird takes the stage.

22. Turkey pepperoni is a legitimate protein.

23. Smoothies are the best way to hide nutrition, hands down.

24. Drool can make a lovely leave-in conditioner.

25. Thumb sucking should be encouraged heavily- it far beats chasing down a pacifier in the middle of the night.

26. It’s okay to use whipped cream as topping to bribe kids to eat fruits and vegetables.

27. Satin dresses and hiking shoes can make a stylish ensemble if colors are complimentary.

28. There is an acceptable threshold of spit-up or smeared food on a Mom’s clothing- and it gets higher with every passing year.

29. There is absolutely nothing wrong with being overwhelmed with the long days and equally overwhelmed by the fast years, tearing up at the thought of when your arms can no longer hold your babies in them.

30. Most importantly, I’ve learned that just as ice cream cones, pigtails, wriggling worms in a muddy hand and lighting bugs are all quintessential hallmarks of childhood, it is also the case that cold, interrupted suppers, sleepless nights, a never ending grocery list, a house that can only stay clean for 2 hours, feelings of love so intense we struggle to express them, a kindredness with all other moms who have gone before, a steady, uphill climb toward self-improvement so that we can be a better person for our children, and a sense that the world is a better place because of the magnificent children we are contributing to the human race are all hallmarks of motherhood.